Birthday

In just three days, the biggest day of Mia's year will be upon us and she, in all her glory, will be able to rule the roost, be queen of the castle, and head order-giver. What I'm talking about is that it will be her birthday. She has been looking forward to this since August 3 of last year. And now it's finally here. I can't tell you how long her birthday list is. Every time we pass something she wants and we won't buy for her, she asks to get it for her birthday. And this has been going on for almost 365 days. Needless to say I've forgotten most of what she wanted from last year. I guess I should ask for a notebook for my birthday.

So last night after Saya's birthday party, that's her best friend, she was examining her calender and counting over and over again how many more days until the blessed event. Thankfully she came up with the same number every time. I guess I would have been a little worried if she was unable to get the same result when the answer was three.

Not only did she count, but she couldn't sleep. She was tossing and turning and sighing and groaning. She would keep coming out to the living room to get a drink of water. She would keep calling out from her room that she can't sleep. And finally it came out that it was not fair that Saya did not have to wait as long as she did for her birthday party. I tried to explain that in fact Saya's birthday is three days earlier, but this had little relevance. The fact that Saya got to have a party before she did only showed that Saya had to wait less time. Why did we make Mia wait so long? Why are we such bastards about the whole thing? We clearly don't care about her and only want to inflict the most harm and hurt feelings by making her wait a full year. I sure hope she gets over it. I know that most of the kids I see in the emergency room could have been saved had their parents just cared more about their birthday's.

But if you think that's mean, then wait until you hear about what we're doing for presents. Her friend party, which is next week, is a no presents party. If we were bastards before, what are we now? We have asked that if people are wanting to give presents that they give them to the local children's hospital via Amazon. Mia is on board with this . . . for now. I'm not sure what will happen next week when no one comes with presents. I can just imagine it. I can see the look after the party. I can see the disappointment. I know that if my mother said no presents when I was her age . . . well I'm sure I would have had none of that and would have forth rightly marched out of her house and ran away, but not before telling her that I was doing so and where I was going.

The reality is that Mia has no shortage of stuff. She has more stuff then she knows what to do with. She has stuff on shelves she can't even reach, even if she stands on a chair and jumps. George Carlin, now passed away, did a whole bit on stuff and our need to have more and more stuff and then to have bigger and bigger houses and garages to house our stuff. I recommend you look it up if you want a good laugh. The point however is that I'm not sure she really needs more plastic crap that usually only last for day, if we're lucky, to fill her ever full room. I can't even walk in her room anymore. The other night I was going in to kiss her goodnight, as I do every night before I go to bed, and walked on what was either a monopoly piece or a small plastic man, either way it hurt, made a noise, and caused me to think twice about whether or not I would allow her to not clean her room in the morning.

I'll keep you updated on the birthday progress.

Jonah on the other hand is just taking everything in. He's doing a great job being a baby. I suppose it's not tough. What does he really have to do? A little crying - check. A little smiling - check. A whole lot of running pooh - yucky check. That's it in a nutshell. Oh yeah, I almost forgot, he also has to not sleep. Super check. Yup, he still only manages to get through a few hours of sleep before he wants to share his version of love with us. Thankfully I don't need to sleep. Andrea's teaching herself how to stay awake at night and sleep at work. I understand she's doing pretty good.

Actually, he's doing well. He is lots of fun, loves to smile and laugh and just watch the world go by. He is very mellow and kind. I have to say that we're having fun. Today we went on some errands and our last one was to the grocery. They had one of those great carts with a baby seat. We got to sing, play and laugh. I think George Thorogood was playing at one point. You know the song - bad to the bone. Nothing says shopping for produce like bad to the bone. I suppose it makes sense. I often play that song when I'm cooking a veggy quiche. That's right, cracking eggs singing about how the nurse knew when I was born that I'd be bad to the bone.

The one thing I can't seem to get, however, is his nap schedule. While he doesn't sleep at night, he does sleep during the day, but I never know when he wants to sleep. Is he tired when he rubs his eyes, or is it when he pulls his ears, or how about when I can't seem to do anything right and he just yells because the wind is blowing. What ever the signals are, I don't understand them. Understanding them would be of great help given that every time I put him down, he fusses. He does finally go to sleep, but usually it's a result me giving him bourbon. Just kidding, I usually use Ambien.

Anyway, I'm a bit behind on pics, but here's one of Mia.

What has happened to the children

When I was a kid I remember summer vacation as a time I could grow, explore, and live with wild abandon. I remember that I would take off in the morning, hang out with my friends, and be gone all day. I would play baseball, basketball, and any other made up game however stupid it seems now. There was no end or limits to the crazy things we would do. My bike was my rocket and my room was the space station. My job as I saw it was to space walk all day, every day. I didn't have a computer, I had no DVD players, and I certainly didn't have a cell phone or any other way to contact my mother. There was just a certain understanding that I would take care of myself; and since we knew everyone in in the neighborhood, there was no worry really. It was expected that I would be home at dinner, that I not cause too much trouble (which means not cause any of the neighbors to call mom), and that I say thank you to those who fed me. I actually wonder now if all the children were eating at other people's houses, whose houses were they at. Anyway, I digress.

The point is that things appear to have changed. Sure we are more technologically advanced. Every house has a computer and I for one can't even begin to imagine living without one. Every home has a cell phone or two or three or four. There is never a time that we're not connected, no matter our age, it appears. Everyone appears to have a DVD player and access to instant movies and TV whether by television or computer. We no longer have to wait for anything and the mere suggestion that one does instills disgust and fear.

The reason I mention all this is that my almost 6 year old daughter is of the new generation. She is able to surf the web, never mind the fact she can't read. She is able to use the phone to call her friends and when told she has to be patient for me to help her she finds this more difficult then it would be for her complete a marathon by walking backwards, uphill and in the dark with one shoe. Let's just say she has learned that in today's society there is no reason to wait: can't get to the movie store to rent a movie, no worries just turn on netflix. Can't wait to play Webkinz, no worry just use the game boy. Can't wait to here an answer from mom or dad, no worry just call someone else's mom or dad. What I'm saying is that she has learned that the best things in life are either on the computer or TV and that those things needn't be things for which she waits.

To be fair, she loves playing with her friends. She loves playing with her neighbor more then anything (perhaps more then ice cream), but if this doesn't happen (which is the case at times) she is at a total loss for what to do. But this is not all her fault. The title of this blog is about the children, not just my daughter. I no longer see herds of children roaming the streets nor do I see children going anywhere besides their own backyard. There seems to be a fear of others that has developed. This fear, which is actually unsubstantiated as there are no more abductions now then there was when I was kid only we hear about each one right when it happens, now keeps us glued to our children and them glued to the house or yard. I'm no different. I watch Mia like a mama bear watches her cubs. God forbid Mia step out the front door without a stern talking to about how she can't go any farther then the first step unless she has Dixie with her and then it's only to the second step.

But are we doing our children any favors? I mean really how is this helping? Our children no longer play outside (of course we could blame it on the fear of uva/uvb rays; or blame it on the fear of those men trolling the streets for children to abduct; or we could blame it on aliens who have landed in my neighbors backyard looking to study little red heads). The down side of this is that our children no longer get exercise, have increased risk of type II diabetes (which used to be called adult onset diabetes), and have no idea how to care for themselves. Our children have become so home bound because of OUR fear that they are now scared of everything around them.

So, what can we do? Or namely what can I do? I suppose I can't let my daughter go out like I used to. I mean, what would the neighbors say? I guess I could just tie Dixie to her and hope that my little dog, who generally just likes to roll over and be pet, protects her. Or what I can do is start to address my own fear and let her have some of the same freedoms I had. My childhood, for the most part, at least summer vacations, was wonderful. It was a time filled with great memories - this is saying something as I can't remember most of that time. I want the same for my daughter. I want her to look forward to everyday and be excited about the endless possibilities - to be able to explore, imagine, play and be a kid. I say let her get dirty. Who knows what life will bring for her, but wouldn't it be nice if at least she could wake up in the morning and go for a space walk . . .

Same quality blog--fresh new look!

Andrea here. Jonah is sleeping. In an attempt to avoid the mountain of laundry in the living room, the minefield of dishes in the kitchen, and the heaping pile of bills on the desk, I have decided to perform the all important task of updating the look of our blog. As you will notice, I have added some new links to the sidebar, and fiddled with the font color. I think it is lovely, although I'm most certain that my graphic designer husband will change this all the next time he signs in. I have also finally changed the time zone from London to Central time. I figure we have been back for 2 years now and can finally take the plunge into American time. Lastly, I have turned off the function that makes you jump through all of those hoops to make a comment. So, now I better go. I think I should probably change the picture on my computer desktop, or something equally important...

Babysitter

I have lost some of my hours at one of my jobs so I recently applied for a position as a casual social worker--I guess it meant that I don't have to wear a tie. I was called for an interview and it was scheduled for today. So, as Andrea was at work, her parents were allowed to sit with Jonah. I say allowed because they had to undergo a grueling process to get their license. They were able to pass the background check, but they didn't do so well on the questionnaire. However, during the interview stage, they made up for the lack of correct answers on the written portion. In the end, I left the kids with them and I am told it went well. The proof's in the pudding, though. I will be playing back the nanny-cam tonight and we'll see what actually happened.

I got to the interview today and it seemed to be going well, at least for the first 1.4 minutes of casual conversation. I then brought up that I have a day job and am looking for nights and weekends. Apparently I was supposed to know by the lack of specificity in the advert that they were looking for a person who could work days. So I left, looking dapper in a sort of modern Cary Grant meets Jonny Depp way (okay, I was actually wearing a suit that fit me when I was 20 pounds heavier, so now I just look like a guy who found a suit in his old man's closet), and headed for the local Japanese market.

Just so you know, this is not the place I would normally go to, although I do like Japanese food. I don't find particular comfort amongst the fish, squid, and octopodes. Nor do I find comfort amongst food for which I can't pronounce the names. But I do enjoy, perhaps more then the next person, Pocky. If you haven't had this, you are missing out on a traditional Japanese delicacy. Yes it's filled with crap. Yest it's not even in the least bit healthy. And yes it may actually contain things which have numbers in the ingredients. But, it is good, not filling (which in the end may be a down side), and tasty. I suggest you go find yourself some, sit down, relax, and devour what is pure Japan.




As you see from these pictures, I had to dress him in the same outfit again. If anyone would like, we are taking donations in the hopes of obtaining some more clothes.

I actually think they look alike. What do you think?

Instructions

So, here is how you leave a comment. If you click on comments at the bottom of the most current post you will be able to type in a comment (and put how much you enjoy the writings and musings of a most talented blogger). Then you have to type in a funky looking word to make sure you are not a machine, or at least if you are then you are capable of human- like thought. You then are given options choosing to put your name, sign in with your google account, or keep anonymous. That's it. I hope this works for everyone. If it does not please let us know I will just call Larry Page and Sergey Brin , founders of Google, and let him know the problems we're having.

Today was our first foray out into the cold and cruel world. We left the protection of our home with only a spare diaper and the whole box of wipes to see what trouble we could find. I had always told Andrea that come hell or high water I will not be house bound by some winy, needy baby and instead would continue to do the things I wanted. That was until I found that while Jonah lacks the power of coherent speech he does not, by any stretch of the imagination, unless we're talking about those machines that fill in random words to leave comments, lack the power of communication. Man can he yell if he's unhappy. So, I remained home all this week catering to his needs as if I were his man-servant and my very existence was to please my master. But today I said I am no longer indentured and I demand my freedom. I demand the ability to choose to do things I want to do. His response was that he would allow me to do the things I want to do as long as they are things he wants to do.

So, we went out. We went to Babies 'r Us and found some things for him, which of course he was okay with. We then went to the dog food deli (this is the level to which we will care for our dog: give her the best food from a deli and to us we gift poverty). After that we went to the sporting goods store. I pushed his limit a bit. I am pretty sure this was the case as he cried on the way home. Even my best Elmo voice couldn't stop him. One day remind me and I'll share with you what the voice sounds like.

His favorite food: fingers

Man's best friend. Actually, this picture doesn't do justice to the terrible cut I did.

His best owl imitation.

Apologies

I'm not sure why it is that some people can't leave comments. At any rate, I will just assume that there are many, many more people reading. Perhaps this blog is one of the more popular on the web and I've not been notified yet.

Anyway, on to the childcare part of my life. My mother has taken to calling me Mr. Mom. I started to think about this and this is what I think: he had more square feet in his house. I'm not complaining, but really we have 834 square feet for four people. Now some people won't count Jonah as a fourth person, but he actually has bigger stuff then the rest of us do. He has an exerciser that is just big and round and not foldable. He has a little swing that also is not foldable. And even if they were foldable, he has no flippin' closet. Don't even get me started on my room. Andrea actually says it's his room because we're moving upstairs. However, it is my room and that is my bed and my closet. And in the immortal words of Joey Tribiani, Jeff doesn't share his room. The reality of the situation is that my bed is now pressed against the wall so I have to climb in from the foot. Jonah's crib is sandwiched between the other side of the bed and the wall, so Andrea has to climb in from the foot. Of course I would be remiss if I didn't mention his changing table which is covering half of the door of the closet. Like I said, his stuff is bigger then ours, so he counts.

On a different note, today was a good day. Well, actually it was tolerable. I enjoyed being with both children today. Mia's playdate didn't happen until 2.00, so I had to figure out what to do with both kids. I was seriously confused on how to manage the play time of a 3 month old and a 6 year old. From my education, which was supposed to allow me to be an expert (yeah right) on development and life stages, I was able to draw on a tool that would help with these things. I wrote down all the things Jonah likes to do and all the things Mia likes to do. Here's the list:

Mia: Not play with her brother, not talk about her brother, not helping with caring for her brother, covering her ears when he screams, and wondering if it's time to watch a movie. In addition to these things she has, at times, talked about playing school, playing with her brother's things in ways which his toys weren't meant to be used (read: sitting her 6 year old butt in his baby seat), play at the park and climb on things, get carried around, watch movies and tv, throw herself around the couch while saying 'I'm bored.'

Jonah: be carried around, be fed, pooh, watch his sister, did I mention be carried. He also has at times appeared to like walks, sleeping, and laughing.

So, what are the results? It looks like the best I'm going to be able to do is carry both kids around for if I don't I'm guessing that one or both will scream and yell and tell me they're bored. My only salvation is that tonight I get to sit down, think about how much my I know my children love me without actually saying this, spend some time with my wife, and watch Californication while sowing a stuffed animal for Mia (all this is read: generation 2.0 man - bigger, better, more willing to cry at the end of Titanic). I have to say that this is a great show, not because there's sex in every scene, although there is, but because it is a really good show about a guy who lost everything and is trying to make things right. I've never been a big fan of David Duchoveny, but I've got to say that he plays this part spot on.

So, here are some pics of the kids.

Really dad, I don't need the strap!



Can you believe how long her hair is?

I love this look. Sort of 'how you doooin' (again in a Joey Tribiani voice).

Is there anybody out there?

I' ve been wondering who actually reads this blog. We've been writing, albeit on and off, for the last few years. There have been times when we've been able to know who read this, but now we only know of two or three. So, please, if you read this, leave a comment. Let's pretend it's home room and your name has been called. Just leave a comment saying 'here.'

My second day at home was great. Jonah and I have really bonded. Now there's no fussing when it's bed time, no crying when it's time to change a diaper, and even Jonah is doing better. Here are some pictures of the day.





Clearly this is not Jonah, but I sort of like the scary movie star look.

One day down,

48 more to go. Let me first start by telling the harrowing tale of Jeff the dog groomer. In an effort to save money and because we couldn't find the time to call the dog groomer, we decided to trim Dixie's hair ourselves. Let me just say this about that - don't do it. I thought that since I cut my own hair, cutting Dixie's would be a piece of cake . . . wrong. Not only did it take more time then I normally spend doing any single activity in my day, it also made our dog look like a Chinese Crested. I'm not sure if you've ever seen these dogs, but imagine a dog that is essentially shaved except for her head. Got that picture in your mind. Now imagine that her tail is full of knots and all snarly. And her nails are long and curling under. This is our dog. She's beautiful. I'm sorry Dixie that you had to be the Guinea pig in our little experiment. I've been graveling for her forgiveness all day. Nothing doing on her part.

So, my first day home was filled with fun and excitement. Actually it was filled with the same three things all day: eat, sleep, awake (which actually means changing diapers), and repeat. I have to say everything went better then expected. Our morning got off to a little bit of a rough start, but soon we were understanding each other perfectly. I'd like to say that I was the father and as such told him how it was to be, but the reality was that I conformed to his needs. He cried, I went to him. He weed, I changed him. He snapped, I stood at attention.

The thing that is helping is that I have Mia loaned out all week. Her Grammy and Grampy took her today and will take her again on Friday; she will be with friends tomorrow and Wednesday; and her Grandma will have her on Thursday. She can be yours for as little as 49.99. That includes lunch and play time. Let me know if your interested. At some point, I suppose, I'll have to actually care for her myself, but until then I got this dad thing down.

An ode to my first day home

Twas the night before my leave started, when all through the house,
not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse.
The diapers were hung by the dryer with care
and lunches were packed with chocolate to be fair.

The children were nestled all snug in their beds
with visions of swings and games and teds.
And mama on the couch and I in the bed,
for Jonah and sleep causes so much dread.

When from our room rose such a clatter,
that I and mama sprang up to see what's the matter.
Away to the crib we flew like a flash,
with crying and yelling causing such a hash.

As the screams started to rise,
Mia awoke with little surprise.
Now there were two children awake in the night,
both wanted attention and on went the light.

With the clock a ticking and night getting on,
We knew there was little time to spare for the sun was yon.
More rapid then eagles and keener then beagles,
we knew what we had to do to please these noisy seagulls.

Now Mia, now Jonah, quiet you be,
back to bed before it turns half past three.
Now back to sleep and back to dreams,
back to slumber with no more screams.

Soon again there was peace in the house,
soon nothing stirred not even a mouse.
This lasted for an hour maybe more,
for it to last all night I would adore.

But soon there was noise and again it started,
the same ole' screams that caused us to smarted.
All night it went for little sleep we had,
there was no time to rest or be sad.

But finally in the morning when it was time to rise,
Our children were resting and there were no more cries.
Unless you count the tears in our eyes,
the ones we had when we said our goodbyes.

(more updates to come)

All good things must come to an end...

...and so has come the end of my maternity leave. I don't even know what to say about it all. The time has just flown by, as I knew it would. Today I happened upon a picture of Jonah at the hospital right after he was born. On the one hand it feels like it was yesterday, but on the other it seems like a lifetime ago! It is so hard to believe that only 12 weeks ago, this amazing baby was tucked away in my belly competely unaware of the world outside. I had no idea what he looked like, or what his personality would be. I worried about how his presence would change the dynamics of our family and whether or not we would bond. Now it is hard to remember what life was like without him, and I can't imagine a sweeter or more wonderful addition to our family. And as for bonding--no problems there. I don't think I could be more in love with this guy. Therefore, I'm sure you can imagine how difficult it is to think about returning to work next week. It really hit me hard yesterday morning and I have spent the better part of the past two days in tears. But despite my sadness I was determined to spend my last two days home with Jonah having a great time. Yesterday I took him on a picnic to a wonderful little park in Minneapolis near Lake of the Isles. It has a little stream running through the middle of it and we soaked our toes in the water. Then we spent some time lying on a blanket staring up into the tree leaves. Jonah loved it! Today I took him to Bread and Chocolate and we had an amazing chocolate oatmeal bar. We had a lovely time. Jonah loves being outdoors and he seems to really enjoy people watching. Unfortunately he wasn't allowed to enjoy any of the chocolate bar. Maybe in a few months...

Anyway, I will be back at work bright and early on Monday morning. I am excited in many ways to be back at work. I really like working and I think it adds a lot of balance to my life--even if it is insanely busy to work full time while trying to be a present and involved parent. I know that in a few months we will settle into a routine and it will all feel normal--just like it did with Mia. But in the meantime it is hard to imagine not spending all day, every day with my little guy. I am going to miss him like crazy. Luckily, however, Jeff is home for the next 7 weeks with Mia and Jonah! Today was his last day of work and he is so, so excited! I am so excited for him. Hopefully he will take over the blog here for a while and chronicle all of his many daddy adventures. Jeff was born to be a dad, and I have no doubt that he will excell at juggling naps, feedings, outings, and fun for both kids.

Below are some pictures of my day at the park with Jonah. I dedicate this blog entry to him. Thank you, Jonah, for making the past 3 months such a joy. You are the sweetest of all sweet babies! I am going to miss you like crazy and you can rest assured that I will be racing home on that bus every night to smother you with kisses!

Jonah enjoying some blanket time at the park

Look how tall this guy is! We met a 7 month old baby today who isn't nearly as tall as Jonah. Where does he get these genes, I wonder.

Me and my boyfriend

Stretching out on his activity mat. Jonah is soooo close to rolling over. I think he
is saving it for next week when he is home with Daddy.

And to top off the end of a big week, Mia lost her tooth tonight while eating pizza out with her Grammy and Grampy! They are pretty sure she swallowed
it with her pizza. Poor thing, she really wanted to see it. We have assured her
that the tooth fairy comes even if she swalled her tooth.

The Jonah Update--week 11

I suppose a Jonah update is long overdue! Summer has been quite busy since Mia has been home and any time that I used to have available for luxeries like blogging are long gone. Fortunately for all of us Mia has started a two week day camp at the Friends School call "Imagine That". She will be doing all sorts of art and theater and imagination games. She is excited to have a few weeks out of the house and I am excited to have things a bit calmer around here for my last two weeks of maternity. That's right . . . I go back to work in two weeks!! I can't believe it. I mean, it is no surprise that the time flew by. I knew it would. It is just one of those things. Overall, it has been wonderful. I think the first 6 weeks were my favorite. I loved all the alone time Jonah and I had during the days to just snuggle up and nurse and nap and love each other. I have vowed to spend these last two weeks really just focusing on Jonah. Forget any home projects that I was hoping to get done on leave, or if the laundry is piling up, or emails that have gone unanswered. These next two weeks are going to be our time to play and have fun. In addition, I am trying desperately to get Jonah on a more consistent nap and eating schedule so that Jeff and Mia have a smoother time of things when they take over on July 20th. Jeff will be home with Mia and Jonah for 7 whole weeks! Unfortunately for Jeff, however, he does not have breasts. Currently Jonah nurses for pretty much every occassion: "I'm tired--let's nurse", "I'm angry--let's nurse", "I'm hungry--let's nurse", "It's Monday at 3:32 pm--let's nurse". You get the picture. So I have been working hard to get Jonah more used to taking a bottle, taking regular naps, and learning to put himself to sleep. The last one is the hardest, but I think we are making progress. You should see the pile of sleep books on my coffee table!

Anyway, below are some photos of the past few weeks. We haven't been too great about taking photos. We must do better! It is so different with the second child. With Mia we averaged about 35 photos per hour! Jonah is so funny, though. He has the best expressions. Whenever I try to get out the camera to capture a look, he gets this quizicle look on his face as if he is thinking "Why has mom's head turned into a black piece of plastic?". Of course the minute I put down the camera the great looks and smiles come back.

Mia dressed up like Daddy.

Some gifts and an outfit from my best friend in Japan--Thanks Kayo!!

Sibling love!

Mia and the girls from next door.

Big smiles!

Trying out his new highchair and loving it!

Practicing for the day he can throw his food at me.

Some of the wonderful babies from my mom and baby group!

A close up of Jonah and his pal--Frank